Here we go again.

I went in for my school program interview today. Funny thing - I don't want to get in. Rather, I want them to accept me and I want to turn them down. I've taken classes to prepare for this and now I want nothing to do with it. Luckily, I've only spent money on books for these previous classes, or else I'd be a little pissed at myself.

Here's the thing... I would have to take out about $20k in student loans for my 1 year program. I'd be unable to work during that year because of the demand of time the program requires. When I finish school and go out to get my job, I'd be paying back about $200 a month in student loans for the next 10 years. My starting salary, which most likely will be about the same for the first several years that I'm in that job, will earn me what I'm making now plus about $250 a month. So, um, what? I'm doing all this for a $50 a month increase? Really?

Chris and I talked it over. I don't even really care about being a surgical tech. I decided on doing it a few years ago because all jobs in healthcare are in high demand, I know I can do it, and it seems interesting. After hearing the ins and outs of the job, I don't want to do it. I'm sorry (I'm really not sorry) but it doesn't sit well with me that I would have doctors and nurses treat me like I'm the lowest of the low. But that's what you are in the OR. You're the least educated, making the least amount of money, and you're treated that way.

One of the questions in my interview today was "Do you cry easily?" That's it. I'm over it. If a requirement of my job is that I have to have thick skin as to not cry all over the operating table because I'm being yelled at then I don't want to have anything to do with it.

So yeah, I'll stick with what I do best - being an office drone. But ya know what - I'll be a head office drone. Someone that's in charge. I won't be the least educated or least paid in the room.

No, this won't be at LN. I see how unhappy my manager is. I'm still deciding if I want to go the Healthcare or Legal route. Business Management is the way to go. I have more experience to get my foot in the door at a law firm, so I'm thinking that might be my best bet.

Anyway, that's what's up. I'll be notified next week if I am accepted into the Surgical Tech program. If it's offered to me, I will decline. If it's not offered to me, then that's a sure sign that I'm doing the right thing.

Either way, it's time for me to get on track to something bigger and better. I will work my way to the top (with some education along the way). No more sitting around just doing my job. I have something to work toward now. Got to get the ball rollin'.